Mistress Collette spoke calmly, her voice carrying the miles to my hotel room in Minneapolis, "You need a butt plug. I want you to buy one while you are up there. I don’t want it to vibrate, just a soft plug."

     I nodded, a silly action as I was two thousand miles away, "yes, mistress. I will let you know when I have it."

     "Wonderful. Talk to you later."

     I said good-bye and hung up the phone. The call had been brief, and I wondered what she had in mind. Why did she call me just to have me buy a butt plug? Need, she had said, I need a butt plug. What was she planning?

     I looked at the phone, my mind spinning. I would find out soon enough.

     Saturday morning I drove around, the narrow streets seeming confining, looking for the adult bookstore I had looked up in the yellow pages provided to the hotel room. Glancing around I spotted a man carrying a black plastic bag. I smiled, realizing I wag getting close. My reasoning was sound as I drove another two blocks and spotted the neon sign. Outcast Video, the sign read: Adult Video’s and Novelties.

     The store was sandwiched between a gas station that advertised: buy one Coke, get one free, and a small Italian restaurant. The smells wafting from the restaurant were delightful and my stomach growled. I had not yet eaten, driving straight from the hotel to the adult video store. I had plColletted to eat as soon as I finished my purchase.

     In front of the store two women were chatting amiably. I swallowed, driving past the store. I can’t stop now, my mind grumbled. It was embarrassing enough to purchase a butt plug, but to walk into the store while two women eyed me would be too much.

     I passed the store, turning right at the next intersection. The store drifted away and I cursed my cowardice. I signaled and turned left into a large parking lot. I circled past a McDonald’s and a theatre, my resolve climbing. I turned right and signaled again to turn left, back towards the store, sitting at a red light.

     The green arrow appeared and I turned again. The two women were still chatting as I passed the store. Tomorrow, I berated myself; I can get it tomorrow. Once again I drove past the store.

     Three blocks later, I turned around again. It was foolish; I kicked myself, to come back tomorrow when I am already here. Why should I go out of my way to return another day when I am just a few blocks away? Foolish.

     The women were still there and I almost drove past again, ready to put off the purchase for another day. The late morning sun illuminated the parking lot brightly. Like a spotlight, I muttered, a huge sphere of light shining on me, screaming, look at me, I am going to buy a butt plug. For my ass.

     I smiled as the women climbed into their car. I pulled into the parking lot and stopped in front of a sign reading: Parking for DeSilva’s pizzeria only! Looking nervously around I hesitated. The cars stopped in traffic all seemed to be watching me, as if a sign hung from my neck: LOOK AT ME. I swallowed and entered the restaurant. Stalling for time, waiting for the women to leave.

     I bought a diet Pepsi, waiting for my change. "Have a good day," I waved, leaving the restaurant.

     The women were gone, thankfully. I opened the door to the rental car and dropped my soda inside. Breathing deeply I shut the door and walked along the white siding of the adult video store. With a nervous glance I entered the store.

     Row after row of adult video’s greeted me. Glossy covers with pictures of beautiful women dressed in enticing lingerie adorned the covers, the models smiling provocatively. I glanced around nervously, looking for the toys. Along the left wall, the toys stood proudly.

     Hands molded of soft latex, plastic vibrators and edible undies lined the wall. I spotted the butt plug and snatched it quickly. Clutching the plug like a hard-won trophy I headed to the register.

     The door opened and an old man entered the store. I shifted the anal invader, a soft jelly plug, to hide it from view; keeping it between the newest shopper and me. The new visitor turned left towards the section marked: New Releases. I chuckled at that, new releases, the store acting as a normal video store. I approached the register and handed my purchase to the proprietor. My eyes remained glued to my feet, afraid to meet the eyes of the man behind the register.

     He rang up the purchase and I gave him a twenty-dollar bill. He gave me my change and wrapped the butt plug in a black plastic bag like the one I had seen that man carrying twenty minutes ago, the one that had alerted me earlier that I was indeed heading the right way.

     I exited the store, my head held down in shame, my face red with my embarrassment. I wondered what the store clerk thought of me, a lone man buying an anal plug. He would know it was for me, he had to know. I darted towards the car, my eyes staring at the pavement.

     I could feel the eyes of the waiting driver’s looking at me as I ran to my rental car. I could almost hear them laughing. "Hey, butt plug," or, "watcha gonna do with that?" The laughter in my head shamed me. I looked down at the black bag, expecting it to have grown clear, revealing its contents. Of course it was still black, it was just my imagination running rampant.

     I opened the car door and sat behind the wheel. Shutting the door I let out the breath I did not even realize I was holding. I was thankful to be in the relative safety of the car, away from laughing eyes. My heart was pounding in my chest, hammering loudly in my ears.

     I opened my diet Pepsi and took a long draw. The soda tasted sweet on my tongue, distracting me from my unreasonable embarrassment. I took another sip and recapped the bottle. I started the car and shifted into reverse. Pulling from my parking space I was thankful to be on my way, the butt plug in my possession.

     Friday morning dawned early. I had set the alarm clock to awaken me at six in the morning. I was flying home today, returning to Arizona, and I had to pack. As I did every morning I checked e-mail. The masculine voice announced "you have mail," and I smiled. I loved receiving e-mail, with it I felt connected to the rest of the world, even miles from home.

     Mistress Collette had left me instructions for the day, and finally the reason for the butt plug became clear.

     Dennis,

     I know that you are afraid to fly, so I decided that you needed a distraction. You will wear the butt plug on your flight. I want you to put it in just before you get in the plane. While in the air you will go to the bathroom and masturbate three times. You are not allowed to come. I find a man with a hard-on can’t think of anything else.

     Enjoy your flight!

     Ms. Collette

     I read and reread the e-mail three times. Wear the butt plug on the airplane, she had commanded. I knew I would, the thought of disobeying did not even cross my mind. What did was whether or not the metal detector at the terminal would detect the anal probe. I knew it would not, rationally, but my mind still argued. Are you sure? my mind asked. Really sure? What if it is detected, huh, then what? How would you explain that?

     I pulled the butt plug from my suitcase and examined it. It was made of a soft jelly-like substance. I could see through it, could tell that there was not metal used in its fabrication.

     My mind chuckled, are you sure?

     Yes, I scolded my mind, yes.

     I read the message one last time and then logged off. I began packing and an hour later I was on my way to the airport, the butt plug stashed away in the inner pocket of my jacket. I left the coat unzipped, as it helped to hide the bulge of the plug. With the jacket zippered closed there was a noticeable lump protruding from my chest that I did not want questioned.

     The moment of truth, I reasoned. I stood in the line for the metal detector, inching forward as the line slowly set their belongings on the black conveyor of the x-ray machine. I was certain that I would sail through undetected.

     Are you sure?

     Yes, dammit, yes.

     I set my book down on the conveyor and stepped through the beige tunnel of the metal detector. The alarm sounded. I yelped silently and looked up; my heart hammering in my chest. Next to me the security guard was directing a young woman to step through the adjoining metal detector again. I swallowed the lump in my throat, and grabbed my book, thankful to have made it through unmolested.

     I checked the black computer monitor proudly displaying the arrival and departure times for the incoming and outgoing flights. On time, the monitor announced, blessedly on time. I checked my watch, less than an hour until I was airborne.

     I waited around the terminal, sitting in one of the plastic chairs, trying to read. I watched the crowd grow in size as more passengers arrived. A large group of high school students arrived at the gate, shouting happily, noisily bragging about their trip. I shook my head; it was going to be a long flight. The teenagers sported T-shirts sporting bands like Nine Inch Nails or Marilyn Manson. One boy was wearing a heavy jacket proudly proclaiming, Spelling Bee – Second Place. The teenagers ran from one side of the terminal to the other, buzzing like a bee. A second place bee.

     Some of the students held multiple conversations, shouting to be heard as they yelled from one clique to the next. Their voices carried like a siren, echoing loudly in the hollow hallway of the terminal.

     The announcing system squawked to life as they announced that they would begin boarding shortly. Taking the cue I left my seat. I walked briskly to the restroom. The bathroom was shaped like an upside-down U. Entering I saw five sinks, two on the left and three on the right. The tile was filthy; looking like it had not been mopped in weeks. Along the back of the U were seven stalls, the largest on the left offered wheelchair access. The other leg of the U held ten urinals, five on a side.

     I entered the handicap stall and locked the door behind me. Looking around nervously, I was sure that the remaining visitors knew what was happening behind locked doors. I pulled the clear butt plug from my breast pocket and set it down on the large, circular toilet paper dispenser. Next I pulled out a zip-lock bag with a thick coating of lubricant. I had brought some toys on my trip, fortunately my bottle of lubricant was one or them.

     I unbuttoned my jeans and dropped them to my knees. I did the same to my skivvies and sat on the porcelain commode. I picked up the butt plug and lowered it into the zip lock bag. Coating the butt plug with the slippery lubricant I pulled the plug from the bag. With a deep breath I brought the invader between my legs and pushed the tip against the tight ring of my anus. I worked the plug in deep, sucking in a breath as the thickest part slipped in. My sphincter trapped the plug, and I could feel it shift slightly as I stood up to fasten my pants.

     My ass felt full, I could feel the plug as it settled into place. I shut my eyes and took a deep breath. I turned around and flushed the toilet, hiding my actions with the loud sound of the flushing water. I gripped the discarded bag of lubricant and balled it up. I unlocked the stall door and exited the stall. The bathroom was mostly deserted as I washed my hands. I snuck my hand into my coat pockets and with a quick motion dropped the baggie into the trash.

     I walked gingerly back to the gate. I looked at the seats and shook my head slightly. I was not anxious to sit down. I leaned against the wall across the hall from my gate. I tried to relax but found that I could only concentrate on my pulse, throbbing against the invading latex that held my sphincter open.

     The announcing system sparked to life as the initial group of passengers were allowed to board the plane. I crossed my legs with my back pressing against the hard wall and immediately uncrossed them. The slight discomfort in my feet paled to the prodding the plug delivered to my ass.

     I watched an elderly woman with silver hair suck on a lollypop like a child and my mind wandered, I am full too. Like her mouth I am also being stuffed. Funny what thoughts appear when fear mingles with discomfort.

     My stomach knotted up as the next three rows were announced. It was getting time to board the plane and I was not looking forward to that. I wondered briefly if my unease, the dancing shakes of my stomach was caused by the nervous apprehension of boarding the airplane, or was it due to the plastic invader shifting happily in my ass? My feet crossed and uncrossed again, and I shook my head slightly.

     I glanced around at the thinning crowd, watching as row after row of passengers left the waiting room to descend the thinly carpeted jetway. Finally my row was announced and I walked slowly towards the gate. The attendant took my boarding pass and wished me a good flight. I grumbled a reply, unease escalating as my fear mounted. My heart was pounding, my hands shaking softly as I descended the gently sloping ramp.

     I inched down the jetway towards the plane, my feet shuffling slowly. The plug shifted and I could almost hear it shout, hello, remember me? Like I could forget. I stopped at the door of the plane, glancing down at the inch wide gap that separated me from the plane. I could see the pale tarmac below and swallowed heavily as I crossed the threshold.

     I found my seat and sat gingerly, the plug driving deeper within my full rectum. I read the safety sheet for the aircraft, wondering if I am the only person that actually reads those things. Am I the only one that is concerned with a crash? With the plane plummeting towards the ground? Glancing around I did not see anyone else even remotely glance at the tri-fold pamphlet.

     As the plane filled with the rest of the passengers a woman asked if I would mind switching seats. She explained that she wanted to sit with her husband and that they had been issued non-adjoining seats. I complied and slowly climbed out of my seat. I worked my way aft towards my new seat where I once again slowly sank into the cushion. The plane filled up, the teenagers taking their shouting on the road, bringing it onto the plane.

     I wondered where the chaperones were for the kids, wishing they would have the teenagers take their seats. The stewardess announced that for the plane to pull away all passengers would have to take their seat and a short blond girl ignored the warning and remained the only person standing, gabbing merrily with her friends. She seemed oblivious that the announcement had been about her. After all, the world revolved around her, didn’t it? Again I wondered why the chaperone did not step in to put his charge in line.

     Finally the plane began to taxi and I yelped silently. We rolled slowly, the stewardesses following the pilot’s directive to make the plane ready for takeoff. The pilot announced we were next in line for take-off and then we were off, screaming down the tarmac at a rapid pace. I shut my eyes as we left the ground, my heart racing. We had just taken off and already I wanted to be on the ground again.

     Please, oh please, oh please, I chanted under my breath my terror rising with each climbing foot the plane rose. My breathing came in ragged spurts, issuing from my open mouth like a baby’s cry. I opened my eyes and watched as the ground grew distant, shrinking until the cars became specs and my fright becoming solid.

     Solid? No, real, my terror became real. Tangible as entity you could touch, my fear climbed, sitting with me, talking to me like an old friend. Too bad you are going to crash, my fear spoke to me, taunting me, too bad that the ground is going to rush up to greet you with the pain of a thousand shards of glass exploding into your eyes. Won’t that be fun? Watch the ground, my fear teased, watch as it screams closer.

     I exhaled, watching the ground, afraid to look away. My breath fogged the plastic window and my friend whispered, it’s only plastic between you and death. Just a thin piece of plastic, fragile as a reed. Shut up, I scolded myself, shut up, shut up….

     "Shut up," one of the noisy teenagers shouted across the crowded plane, "just shut the fuck up." He was locked in an argument over some trivial bit of nonsense. How could he fight like that? Didn’t he know that he was about to die?

     The plane bounced in the air and I felt the butt plug shift to probe deeper in the soft flesh of my ass. I had been oblivious to its presence but the bumpy ride slammed the intruder back to the forefront of my mind. Remember me? it asked. I groaned slightly as the plane continued to rock from side to side, pitching slightly. It was as if the plane was fucking me, driving the plastic invader in maddening circles inside my ass.

     Two soft tones sounded through the cabin and the soft voice of the stewardess announced that the pilot had turned off the fasten seat belt sign and that it was safe to move around the cabin. I chuckled, safe, my ass. My ass felt full as the plug prodded deeper, filling me.

     The mad rush of passengers began, walking aft to the lone bathroom. I waited patiently; dancing on the plug as it shifted merrily in my ass. The line tapered off and I excused myself, asking my two neighbors to allow me passage. I slipped tenderly from my seat and waited until the bathroom became clear.

     The plane shook under my feet, a soft tremor that rocked my joints. I set the lock on the bathroom door and unbuttoned my jeans. I pulled them and my underwear to my knees. I kept a death grip on the stationary handle just to my left, my fingers tight, digging into my own palm. Swallowing my fear briefly I lowered my right hand and began stroking my flaccid penis.

     My stokes became furious as my cock hardened in the cramped little bathroom. The plane rocked slightly, shifting in its path. I squeaked like the frightened mouse that I was as I continued to masturbate, standing nervously in the tiny room. I tilted my head back, my arousal peaking. My knees flexed as the plane rocked, my body waving in the cramped confines of the bathroom. The plug spurred me on; escalating my arousal as it reached deep into my bowels. I was rushing to finish, worried that there were fellow passengers waiting outside the closed door.

     My hips flexed as my orgasm swelled. I pulled my hand from my penis and shifted to stand on tiptoe. My passion wavered and I lowered myself to my feet. I pulled up my pants and underwear, buttoning the fly. The plane danced sideways again and my heart throbbed painfully in my chest, pounding from both fear and desire. My turgid penis bulged against the tight denim as I turned to exit the cramped room.

     I returned to my seat, my cock pressing uncomfortably against the side of my pants. The plug reminded me of its presence as I lowered myself back to the softness of my chair.

     I stared out the window. The ocean stared back, but was it ocean? It looked more like a void, blue, but empty none the less. The blue of the ocean mixed with the white haze of soft clouds. It was like staring into nothingness. The black ocean of the night sky had white stars to break the illusion of emptiness; this vacant view had no such interference. I stared and it scared me, causing my feet and palms to sweat. With the emptiness, unbroken by anything, below me, I knew we could fall until we hit the hard surface of the ocean and never see it coming.

     Which was worse? To fall, watching the ground rushing up to greet you like a long lost relative welcoming you with open arms, or to fall not knowing when you are going to hit, nervously awaiting the inevitable? To see or not to see? Perhaps Shakespeare had been wrong all this time.

     My hand shot up to toy with the tag of my collar, my fingers twisting in space. I was not wearing the collar, of course, but I took comfort in the reassuring motions my hand made. My mouth was dry with fear, my lips cracked. My fingers danced nervously against my throat as the plane continued to carry me home.

     The plane bounced hard, driving the plug painfully into my ass. I grimaced, my hand dropping to squeeze the steel armrests. I glanced around fearfully, at my two neighbors reading peacefully, at the shouting, milling throng of teenagers as they continued their ruckus, at the stewardesses inching down the aisle offering the small plastic glass of beverages to the passengers, amazed by all of them. How could they act as if nothing was wrong?

     The wings seemed to bend, flapping in the rushing air. The loud sounds of the cabin seemed to fade as I stared out the window, lost in my own world. Lost in the feelings of the anal plug filling my ass and helpless to control the intangible fear that threatened to swallow me whole.

     The stewardess delivered me a tiny cup of soda and for the first time it dawned on me that my tongue was swollen with thirst. I drank the cupful in one long pull, draining the glass. I popped an ice cube in my mouth, sucking on the cold square.

     Once again an announcement blared through the cabin reminding the passengers that while the fasten seatbelt sign was off, it was important that the guests remained seated with the seatbelt clamped for their own safety. And again it dawned on me how self-centered the teenagers were as they ignored the wailing announcement. How can they mean me, after all I am the only person standing?

     The haze below lifted, giving way to thick clouds rolling in like fog. My stomach knotted, the fear ripping into my body, hurting me. Pain in the panic. I sucked another block of ice in my mouth, wetting my dry tongue.

     Below me the thick clouds climbed higher, turning dark. The gray clouds, with their white mountain peaks, threatened rain. They looked like storm clouds and I expected the clouds to burst forth, sending large droplets of water skyward, ignoring gravity, to pelt the plane with the wet rain. I imagined flashes of lightning to rip skyward to strike the plane sending it falling into the hidden haze below.

     I shifted in my seat, the plug becoming more and more unnoticeable as I became acclimated to its relentless probing. We continued to soar through the sky, the threatening clouds giving way to fluffy clouds of white. We flew past a mountain of clouds, close enough to touch. A peak giving way to a valley and then climbing again, not as high or thick, but mountainous none-the-less. The plane shook in turbulent air and the pilot lit the fasten seatbelt sign. The wings flapping in the rough air, clouds casting shadows against other clouds as my heart pounded in fright.

     I gripped the tray tightly, my knuckles turning white. Just as quickly the shaking stopped and the fasten seatbelt sign snapped off. A warning perhaps.

     Like smoke rising the clouds reached higher, thick and bulging. My feet were damp in my socks and my palms were sweating again. I dried them against my jeans, rubbing my thighs rapidly. I stared out the window at a looming mushroom cloud and my mind screamed, imagine that. Was it a portent of things to come? Or just a cloud reaching to the heavens?

     The plane shook, the plane rocked, the plane thumped and the plane pitched, and through it all my heart hammered in fear. One of my neighbors got up to use the bathroom and I took it as an opportunity to excuse myself as well. I climbed out of my seat the plug shifting in the cavern of my ass. When the bathroom was empty I climbed inside. The shimming plane frightened me as I lowered my pants again. I sat on the toilet, the plug threatening to slip from my ass.

     I began to masturbate again, stroking my growing penis. My hand rocked rapidly, pulling on my cock. I had to clench my ass to hold the plug firmly. I brought myself to the edge of orgasm again, stopping as my passion peaked. My breathing was heavy, and I took in a deep breath, calming my racing heart. I stood up and redressed again. I washed my hands and returned to my seat. My cock throbbed in need inside the confines of my jeans.

     I sat down, the plug prodding me again. I watched the passengers in front of me, their heads waving, shifting sideways in unison, none defiant, controlled by the shaking plane. I turned to stare out the window at the clouds below. The soft peaks sneaking higher, rolling thickly in the blue sky.

     The plane bounced and I tightened my seatbelt again, pulling on the already tight strap until it threatened to cut me in half. The fasten seatbelt sign lit and stayed on as the plane began to buck. The teenagers continued to talk loudly, yelling back and forth in the swaying cabin and my head throbbed in the din.

     I sucked on the last of my ice, trying to read my book, but unable to read more than a page before the plane hit a patch of rough air and my shaking hands set the book down to grip the tray tightly. The bulbous clouds gave way to the vacant haze again, the desolation of the milky blue ocean hiding its secrets from my sight. That desolate blue could be ten miles or ten feet away, it was impossible to tell.

     Perhaps it was better to have the haze; I answered my previous question. I would think it easier to bear always thinking we were miles away as we plummeted to our deaths, not knowing when it was coming. Always praying that there was a chance to live before the world popped out like the final failed attempt of a blown light bulb, a flash and then nothingness.

     I swallowed nervously as the plane continued to rock in the invisible currents of the air. I felt like a deer trapped in the brilliant sphere of light cast by the pair of high beams, but unlike the deer I had no place to run to. No thick woods to get lost in, no trail to safely bound down. I was stuck, watching the car race closer.

     I glanced at my neighboring passenger, looking at the yellow smiley-face pin stuck to her sweater. The pin seemed so optimistic, so happy that I had to turn away, to once again stare out the window at the hazy desolation below.

     The announcing system blared to life as the plane banked lazily to the left. The pilot announced that we were beginning our descent and I breathed a silent sigh of relief. I excused myself again, explaining my fear of flying to the two women sitting to my right. With a forced smile I squeezed my body past them and walked back to the bathroom again.

     With the shaking plane and gentle banks I once again pulled my pants down and sat on the uncomfortably cold metal of the unyielding toilet seat. I felt the need to defecate, the plug filling my rectum. I tightened the taut ring of my sphincter on the plug and began to stroke my soft penis to life again.

     My strokes grew in intensity as my penis hardened under my ministrations. I pulled on my cock, bringing myself to the tantalizing bring of orgasm again. The plug spurred me on, pushing fully into my body. I shut my eyes, concentrating on the pleasurable strokes of my hand. The plane banked again and I shifted on the seat, my hand leaving my cock to steady myself in the tiny room.

     The plane leveled off again and my hand returned to its pleasing task. I brought myself to the brink of distraction and quickly pulled my hand away, moaning in frustration. I took deep breaths, willing my orgasm to subside, my head looking up at the odd shaped ceiling. My ass flexed and my cock bobbed in reply as I reached between my legs to hold the plug in place.

     I stood up and got dressed, my penis straining against my tight jeans again. I knew it would relax in a few moments as it had the previous two times I masturbated. I washed my hands again and returned to my seat, pulling the seat belt tight against my waist.

     The plane descended into the haze, slowing slightly. Creeping towards the ever-present emptiness. Where was land? When was land?

     The haze gave way to growing textures on the ocean surface below. I watched white specs appear, fade and wink out. The short life span of a wave. Life begins, immediately fades, and then gone. The waves breaking below sent my frazzled mind spinning. Below, it argued, always below, like Satan, death and crawly things that called below home.

     The plane bucked again and my head jerked nervously about. Out the window, at the stewardesses collecting the last of the miniscule drink cups and at the fasten seat belt sign glowing brightly.

     The plane banked again and I could see land appear, like a welcome beacon, the shoreline grew as we sank through the clouds. My grip remained tight on the armrest as we turned towards the runway. My mouth was dry again, my chest throbbing. I hear a grinding and knew that the landing gear had been lowered and locked into place.

     My body hurt, the fear that kept my muscles tense eased slightly as we descended towards the ground. I was sore, my arms aching and my chest throbbing. The pain of panic or the agony of terror. What ever you called it, it was real.

     The teenagers were thankfully quiet as the plane sank towards the airport. The ground grew large out the small plastic…

     …It’s only plastic between you and death…

     …Window. I noticed the familiar landmarks that marked that I was home; the highway system, the marina, all the things that helped to ease my tortured mind. The plane sank lower and then the runway appeared beneath us. With a screech the plane touched down, the wing pulling apart and the flaps bending skyward to help stop the plane. The plane slowed to a snails pace and I exhaled heavily.

     The pilot came on again thanking us for flying, almost begging us to use the same airline when next we flew.

     "Not bloody likely," I muttered under my breath, vowing to never get in an airplane again if I could help it.

     I glanced at the woman sitting next to me, and at the smiley face on her lapel. I will have a good day now, I said to myself, my tense breathing easing slightly now that the plane was safely on the ground and rolling towards the terminal.

     Exiting the plane I entered the first bathroom I found and locked myself in a stall. I pulled the plug from my ass and then cleaned it as well as I could with the course toilet paper provided. I wrapped the intruder with spare paper and tucked it back into the breast pocket of my coat.

     I exited the stall, washed my hands, and then went to retrieve my luggage. Yes, I thought, my mind still seeing the smiley-face, it will be a good day after all.

     I arrived home and set up my computer. Checking e-mail I smiled again at the masculine "you have mail."

     I read the e-mail happily.

     Dennis,

     I hope you had a good flight. You may masturbate and come for me now that you are home.

     Ms. Collette

     And that is what I did.

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